Monday, July 03, 2006

Day Nine : Phoenix, AZ to Indian Wells, CA

Mile 2382.3 -- See ya Phoenix! California, here we coooooooooooooooooooooooooooome!

Mile 2384.1 -- We stop for gas. Guess who bought an entire box of illegal alien ICE Mint Mentos that are only supposed to be sold in Indonesia?

Mile 2422.5 -- Jeff is on the phone! He is very important!

He's way too busy to talk to anyone. Especially Zak.

Mile 2428.3 -- Bessie the cow never asked for the anal probe.

Mile 2436.0 -- Yet another tractor trailer tries to run us over.

Mile 2468.0 -- 297 miles to Los Angeles! We'll see you soon!

Mile 2478.2 -- What up with this Pink Grapefruit Mentos?

It looks like it has jizzy eye!

Mile 2501.2 -- Bad Ass Strippa time, yo!!!

Mile 2510.5 -- The "sing every song like Fred Schneider from the B-52s" bit continues to entertain!

For those of you having problems understanding what is going on here, watch this...

...and hopefully that will make everything all better. Or something.

Mile 2522.1 -- Jon invents the jerky sandwich...

...Wheat Thins plus Beef Jerky turns out to be deliciously salty, but also deliciously hard to eat.

Mile 2535.2 -- Thank G-d/Yahweh/Allah! We're back in California!

Mile 2535.3-- Jeff sees a truck filled with Hay.

Guess what he says?


Mile 2558.0 -- Only 75 miles to Indio...which mean it's less than two hours to the Miramonte Resort and Spa in Indian Wells, CA!

Hi...Jon and Jeff are both very excited to relax!

Mile 2591.4 -- Hi...Bimbo!

Where's Bookie?

Mile 2605.9 -- Jeff and Jon convince Brad and Keith to meet them at the Miramonte Resort and Spa in Indian Wells! Jon is very excited to talk to "real people." Unless Jeff cuts him first.

Also...Who's Brad?

And does anyone want a Chocolate Chip Cookie?

Chips Ahoy!!!

Mile 2609.9 -- Mecca!

I hear they pray a lot there.

mile 2616.2-- We pass a sign for Frontage Road!

There's a whole lot of "Frontin'" on that road. You want to avoid it at all costs...especially if your name is Jeff Nucera.

Mile 2628.3 -- The whole gang is VERY excited to have a "me" day at the Miramonte Resort and Spa!

Bessie can't wait to get a relaxing cobblestone massage.

Jollibee is in desperate need of a facial.

Syphie is oozing with excitement at the prospect of a body scrub.

And Allie the Alien is very excited to try out his new Anal Probe 2000 on a whole new set of people.

Mile 2654.0 -- We pass a sign for "Monroe Street." Jeff launches into a "Too Close For Comfort" bit. Ted Knight rolls over in his grave.

Mile 2640.0 -- Almost there!

Mile 2645.7 -- Hi...we just passed the Miramonte Resort and Spa! And there is no place to turn around.

Of course there isn't.

Mile 2646.8 -- We've arrived at the Miramonte Resort and Spa!

Let the relaxing begin...NOW!


Jessica said...

You are adorable.

Rachel said...

FYI: BIMBO is the Mexican company that makes all of Entenmann's (veryjewishcompany) products for the United States. Why would I KNOW such a fascinating fact? Because I protect the borders of this great nation, and it's my business to know a "bimbo" from a "BIMBO." And maybe because I actually had to cross-examine someone once about how he could work at a company called "BIMBO" and not actually be a "bimbo." People, I could not make this stuff up if I tried!